A Closed Mouth Gathers No Feet

How true is that statement. It really irks me that some people via internet and in real life feel the need to jump in some elses backyard. They tend to point fingers and criticize things that other(s) may have or may have not done.

Well I for one would like to point out that I think it is erroneous behavior. What goes on in other peoples back yards or in their homes it's strictly their business. And the same principle works vice versa. It is so easy for some to start listing things that were told in private. It is so not cool to blurt out those mishaps via the internet. If something was told in confidence, regardless of circumstances, that is where they should stay. End of Story.

I have a few friends of mine that are very close and dear to my heart. I will not name those people, because I will assume they know who they are. I, for one, will speak my mind, and my opinion(s), regardless of the situation. I've also been dealt raw deals in life as well. Not by my folks, but by friends, ex(s), etc. I've learned because of my past not to get to close to people. It's very sad really when you think about it. But it is my way of shutting the doors on those that do not deserve my kindness, friendship, and love. Most of my closet friends know a lot of what has been dealt my way. And they've been there to pick up the pieces, or least have tried too. Trust is a big issue with me as well. It will take a whole lot for me to trust anyone.

Most of my "friends" that I consider to be friends, rather than aquaintances is online. I converse with them on a daily basis, if not every other day. I've had a whole lot of friends over the years, but they've turned out not to be the true friends whom I thought they were. They were utterly undeserving to have my friendship. My best friend (whom I thought was my best friend), slept with my ex husband. To this day I have not forgiven her, and most likely I never will, nor will I ever forget. Some have told me that I should forgive her but never forget. But that is so easy for an outsider to say. Until they've walked in my shoes, and been in my shoes, how could they possibly make a statement like that. The answer to that is they can not.

I have a few friends online that are or have been in the same situation that I was dealt. I've done my part as a friend to give them my opinion on the matter(s) in ?. However, I can only tell them what I would do if I was in their position. Ultimately, it is up to them to choose what they feel must be done to rectify the situation. Whether they stay and resolve it or they cut their losses, it will be their place to choose what they deserve. In my friends cases I think they deserve better than what they have going for them now. But again, I am speaking figurativly on this matter if it were me. All I can say is I hope and pray that they do something before it surfaces and shatters.

After my divorce, I had a whole lot of mixed emotions. And there was a brief moment were I shut down and stopped doing anything. (my own self pity party) -- but my mom, pulled me up, and told me, don't you dare let that bastard do this to you, you have 3kids that need you more now than ever. And you know what -- she was right!!

I've become a much wiser, stronger, woman/mother, since my divorce. It's been 2+ years since my seperation/divorce. I consider myself very lucky that I was able to get out while I could. I have to admit, to this day I still love him, (not in love with him), because we have a son between us. Will I ever want him back? Hell no!! He didn't deserve me than, and he doesn't deserve me now or ever! But I am much more happier now than I have ever been. I traveled down a bumpy road, crashed, and rebuilt myself to where I am today. I just hope that my friends in my situation can do what I have done, and in the end think back to themselves and say "I deserve happiness".

Til next time ..